A good outdoor first date is short, easy, busy and near a car park. Everything that goes wrong comes from breaking one of those four.
Meeting outside is one of the best ways to do a first date. You walk side by side instead of staring at each other. There is something to look at when the conversation dips. And it finishes when the path does, so nobody has to work out how to leave.
It goes wrong when somebody plans an eight mile route on a ridge in November with a stranger they have never met. Here is how to get the good version.
Keep it under an hour
An hour is long enough to know whether you want a second one and short enough that a bad match is not a ruined day. If it is going well, you can always add the tea shop at the end. If it is not, you both go home at a sensible time and nobody has to fake enthusiasm on a summit.
A four mile loop is plenty. Two miles is fine.
Pick easy ground, even if you are both fit
A first date is not the day to find out whether somebody has the knees for a scramble. Flat or gently rolling, a decent surface, no stiles you have to help each other over, no bit where you have to shout over wind.
Country parks, reservoir loops, canal towpaths, coastal sections, National Trust grounds and forestry trails all work. They are also usually signposted, which removes the argument about whether you are lost.
Choose somewhere with other people about
This matters for safety and it matters for atmosphere. A busy trail has other walkers, dogs and small distractions, and that takes the pressure off. An empty hillside with a stranger is a lot more intense than either of you needs on day one.
Meet at the car park, in daylight, and travel separately. Nobody should be relying on the other person for a lift home on a first meeting.
Tell someone where you are going
Send a friend the name of the place, the time, and the name the person uses on their profile. Check in when you get home. This is normal and sensible and anyone decent will do the same for their own friend.
If someone tries to move the conversation off the site before you have met, or pushes for somewhere remote, treat both as a reason to slow down. Our safety page covers what to do and how to report it.
Have a plan for rain
Wet weather is not a reason to cancel, but standing in a car park in horizontal rain deciding what to do is a bad start. Pick the route, then pick the backup in the same five minutes. A garden centre, a café, a cathedral, a museum, an hour at a farm shop.
Say the backup out loud when you make the plan. It makes you look organised and it removes the awkward negotiation on the day.
Bring the dog, if there is one
A dog does most of the social work for you. It gives you something to talk about, it sets the pace, and it makes the whole thing feel like a normal afternoon rather than an assessment.
Just check first. Some people are nervous around dogs and would rather say so beforehand than pretend for an hour.
